Kitchen Renovation for a Noncook - Day 4

Day 4 finds our heroine on high alert.

The strange men her momma warned her about have arrived. Tile demolition

They carry weapons of mass tile destruction.

They wear their pants precariously low, posing the very real threat of spontaneous butt cleavage.

She's amazed she had to actually 'splain to her husband, her proclaimed protector, why she’d covered the ceiling vent in the bathroom with taped-on toilet paper. Hel-lo! There are strange men roaming around in the attic! Supposedly checking electrical wiring. Uh huh. More like to see things through the vent. And it wouldn't be just butt cleavage, my friend! 

Hubby thinks it's a good idea she stay mostly in the safety of the back office. He's probably right. In the past few days our brave girl has headed hungrily for a refrigerator no longer there, nearly set things on counters that no longer exist, and in a true burst of intelligence, bought dishwashing detergent for the dishwasher now parked in the garage—and by the way, there is no longer a freaking sink to store it under either.

Maybe hubby won't notice the box of Cascade tucked underneath the bed.

Right next to the seven varieties of Quaker instant oatmeal. 

Tune in for tomorrow's next exciting installment: Toilet Paper as Window Shades and Other Creative Uses.

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